It's come to this

I have become a QVC shopper.

I could pretend that I only tuned in to see Laura Bennett—the very sight of whom always cheers me up—but that wouldn't be completely honest. This is honest: buying stuff is fun. And buying stuff before the time limit's up is like crack.

Also, I've become fascinated by QVC presenters. The way they keep talking, how they stand without rocking and move their hands without shaking—and the selling points they seem to instantly pull out of the air! Really. It's like a little presentation-skills seminar every evening.