Mistakes? We don't make mistakes.

Remember that scene in Brazil when Jonathan Pryce is driving to work? Yeah? Well, most people considered his car to be yet another gloomy visual clue to the de-humanizing oppression that surrounded him. Most people, that is, except Daimler.

I believe DealBreaker sums it up best.

We want healthy children and we want them to stay the hell away from us

Starbucks sells drinks that kids may like and, in one article, all the disparate pet causes of society's privileged factions collide.

It hurts when I do this

Not to dog-pile because I'd hate to be that mean -- really! -- but tell me again why consumers can't be trusted to judge pharmaceutical marketing messages but doctors can:

"Around the country, doctors in private practice have set up tax-exempt charities into which drug companies and medical device makers are, with little fanfare, pouring donations — money that adds up to millions of dollars a year....the tax-exempt organizations represent what some other doctors, as well as regulators and industry consultants, say is a growing conduit for industry money. The payments, they say, can bias the treatment decisions of physicians, may lead to suspect research findings and at times may even risk running afoul of anti-kickback laws."

I'm waiting for the AMA to call for a moratorium on all this. Waiting. Still waiting.

I'm pretty sure Hell will feel like a flight that doesn't ever land

Etiquette? They oughta be laws.

Crumb-believable!

For that alone, heads should have rolled at Kraft. Now other issues -- revenue, competition, blah blah blah -- have sped things up so PepsiCo's Irene Rosenfeld will be taking over.

I believe you're familiar with Ms. Rosenfeld's work. Baked Cheetohs. Zero trans fats. Two short years but so many, many press releases. Out in Plano, they must find a way to bravely carry on.

You just shut up, mediabistro!

He's the love of my life and nothing you say is going to change that!

Is this helpful?

In every brainstorming session, we are told there are no bad ideas. In the real world, oh honey. Just look at Home Depot's decision to reward clerks for doing a good job. Sounds laudable but: "industry experts question whether offering employees as much as $2,000 extra a month and $10,000 a quarter is enough to overcome what they say is a shortage of salespeople in the aisles....'The problem [with the plan] is that it doesn't solve the basic, core problem of having knowledgeable people working in your stores,' said George Whalin, founder of Retail Management Consultants. 'In recent years, Home Depot has spent very little educating people.'"

Turns out Home Depot's full of ideas. "[I]n attempting to cut costs, Home Depot's management had effectively replaced its more knowledgeable and experienced store staff with less seasoned employees, plunging many of its stores into relative disarray." But not to worry. The guys at corporate are getting taken care of. Really taken care of.

Flummoxed. I'm flummoxed.

In what may be the oddest answer an advice columnist has ever given, Steve Strauss actually encourages a small business owner to start an in-house ad agency. Evidently, it's as easy as printing up new letterhead! It will save so much money! And your bookkeeper has always wanted to get into TV!

Remember: it's easy to be funny in France. Just ask Jerry Lewis.

I dunno. Maybe Martin Sorrell's attempt at comedy won't go over so well with some people.

Happiness in the workplace

Really, shouldn't OSHA demand that every cube in America come equipped with a set of these?

Dallas history is different than regular history

An old theater-turned-nightclub that changed concepts every 6 months burned yesterday and Dallas is mourning the historic loss. Also lost in the fire were several small businesses: "Wednesday was the first day of summer, a start to economic boom times in the entertainment and shopping area. Angie Wood was working at Condom Sense when a stranger ran inside. 'Your building's on fire,' he said."

A condom store employee named Wood. Genius IS in the details.

On the bright side

Mark Cuban will be honored by the Gotham Awards for "'bringing independent cinema to mainstream America'" and for having "'introduced exciting and new distribution models.'"

Kinda makes up for that whole parade thing.

The enduring power of the Royale With Cheese

But I thought they hated us: "even as protesters sought to cast McDonald's as the embodiment of all that is wrong with fast food and American culture, the French never stopped eating its hamburgers. Indeed, for all the attacks on the company, McDonald's operating profit in France last year was second only to that of McDonald's in the United States."

My one and only live-blogging post

The Mavs player intros? My recommendation would have been to dispense with the over-wrought team video and just wheel out a cartful of 250,000 one dollar bills. Deal with that, weird flag-waving guy!

11:15PM UPDATE: Um. Yeah.

Pauline Kael lives, apparently edits new magazine

So what's with all the business magazines all of a sudden? And why the focus on women? Dealbreaker.com tries to answer. And just like a Mardi Gras King Cake, there's a little something special baked into this post:

"[Conde Nast's Portfolio Editor in Chief Joanne] Lipmann said, 'Blogs? I don't know why anyone reads them. It's like listening to the crazy guy on the subway rant!'"

Explains so much, doesn't it?

The whole world has gone Golden Palace

Did you see it? "Wright entered the ring in clever attire, wearing a gray business suit, complete with shirt and tie, over his trunks." It was genuinely funny. Although when he turned around to reveal the poker site logo on his back, I thought it compromised the artistic integrity a bit.

Then 12 hours later, I re-considered. When it comes to walking advertisements, fighters are, comparatively speaking, too restrained.

The Fanta dancers rawk!

This may mean it's time to add to your Netflix cue: "Cinema advertising revenue again jumped more than 20% last year to pass the half-billion-dollar mark for the first time."

Quote of the day

This: '"it's important that hats are witty, but not dumb. The British seem to appreciate that.... A kooky hat is part of their culture.'" Ya think?

And just a side note: I would have thought being a milliner in this day and age would be a bit of a struggle but if it means you get to lounge around on an opium bed, I'm interested.

A question mark forms directly above my head

JWT promotes itself on the Huffington Post.

Mmm. Mmm. Hmm.

The Chunky Soup curse. You can't argue the facts!